fluffy homemade snuggle from a jumpsuit

The Cutest, Creepiest Easy to Make Snuggle Your Kid Will Love!

I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again, one of the best things about those illogical, loud and really quite ridiculous things we call toddlers is putting them into a jumpsuit.

The second a toddler goes into a onesie, they seem to turn from demon child whose off switch and volume control buttons are jammed, to a fricken adorable demon child whose off switch and volume control buttons are broken.

Dad is cactus, but look how cute the onesie is!

The fluffier the onesie, then cuter the child becomes, and the better you get at dealing with the fact that they just coloured in the cats bum with a red Texta.

If your child is like mine (or if you are like me) they (you) will get sentimentally attached to those soft, loveable outfits.

But like it or not, your damn kids keep growing, and before you know it, their favourite outfit no longer fits over their chubby thighs (check out our sugar free tomato sauce recipe if you want to make your kids to fit in their clothes a bit longer 😉 )

So what do you do with that fluffy wad of adorableness when it no longer fits your child?

You turn it into the cutest, creepiest snuggle you have ever seen of course!

It’s as simple as turning the onesie inside out and stitching up the arm and leg holes!

you could easily use a sewing machine, but honestly you’d be finished before you set the machine up..

Make sure that you zip the zip up – but not quite to the top, as you’ll need to be able to undo it again, to turn the jumpsuit back the right way around after stitching up the neck hole. The neck hole can be a bit tricky to line up, so take your time and get it right.

Once you’ve finished sewing, unzip and turn it in the right way, before stuffing with bear stuffing, or hell, you can just use rags.

nawwww! a headless toddler! At least it can’t scream at you..

If you want to be able to open it and take out the stuffing to wash the suit (once your toddler tries to feed her new headless friend a chocolate smoothie) you’re finished, otherwise just put a few extra stitches in at the top of the zip (so the your toddler cannot open their new snuggle and leave a trail of stuffing through the house)

Don’t look in the background.. I have no explanation

I personally left mine unsewn, as I have plans of sticking some sausages in there on Halloween, and freaking the 3 year old out by disembowling her buddy in front of her ;-). we take Halloween very seriously around these parts..

Do you have a burning question that you would love Mrs. Piggy’s help with? Email her at info@pimpmypigsty.com, and let her solve all of your problems!

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How to Store The One Hundred Gazillion Soft Toys Your Child Has But Never Plays With

It’s a fact of life, if you have children, your house will be completely and utterly overrun by squashy, fluffy, adorable looking, slobber catching, germ infested, matted with indescribable brown muck soft toys.

This monster is actually too big for this hack, but I thought I’d take this opportunity to tell the person that bought this for my kids that I HATE YOU!

What was originally the one adorable snuggle that you couldn’t resist buying before your darling babe slid out of your uterus is now a menagerie of toys, animals, made up animals, and weird shapes that are supposed to resemble catballs (I think.. that’s my best guess)

meow (I think)

There is no longer room for your child on their bed because a filthy unwashed (seriously, how much of a hassle is it to wash and dry these things?) hoarde of dustmite nests have moved in.

Even worse is when mice invade your home, gnaw through half of the toys and make nests with the stuffing under your child’s bed..

Nice soft toys you’ve got there.. Be a shame if someone were to chew half it’s head off and crawl inside of it…

What?  Yeah, that never happened to me either.. I was just saying that it would really suck if it did…

Lets be honest though, none of you are washing these dusty balls of fluff on a weekly basis – and if you are, in my (un)educated opinion I’m pretty sure you need a new hobby and a drink or two!

The best way to deal with this mess, is so simple, easy, and relatively cheap!

With this simple hack your children still have access to all of their loved toys, but even better, I can guarantee that within 1 week they will lose interest in pulling them out and creating chaos in your beautiful, tidy, pinterest worthy house!

Out of sight, out of mind!

It’s quite simple really, all you need is a beanbag case, and voila!  Instant beanbag without those horrible beads!

Get the kids loading it up, while you pour yourself a wine!

As an added bonus, this makes your beanbags easily washable!  Just take out animals and wash(wash the animals too if you still haven’t found yourself a good hobby)

The one thing that I hate the absolute most about beanbags is those clingy, lighter than air, defies the laws of physics white filler beans!  Now I ca be rid of those beans of the devil once and for all!

I think they like it (or like tackling each other until one of them screams like a banshee) who knows..


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Ask the Pig: 2 Year Old Tantrums

Dear Mrs. Piggy,
I need your help!

I have a 2 year old that screams.

And when I say screams, I mean screams.

Not squeals once and keeps playing.  Screams.  Tantrums, meltdowns, I don’t know what you call them, but they’re loud and they last FOREVER.

If I ignore them they get louder.

If I try to console her she gets louder, runs away, flails on the floor.

If I give her time out she screams non stop!

I’m losing my mind.  What can I do??

Please help.

Deafened mum, Arkansas

Dear Deafened Mum,

Buy noise cancelling headphones.

Mrs. Piggy.


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Ask the Pig: Fighting Children


Dear Mrs. Piggy,

I’m writing today because my children won’t stop fighting!
I have a 5 and a 7 year old (both boys) and they just fight constantly.  Some days it feels like they wake up fighting, and keep going all day.
I’ve tried everything to get them to stop. Punishments, rewards, separating them (they somehow end up together again) it just doesn’t work!
If I leave them to it, it usually gets violent, we’ve been to the hospital 4 times in the last 6 months.  I think the doctors are beginning to think that I’m abusing my children.

Please help!

– Frazzled mama,


Dear Frazzled mama,

Are you really writing in to me for this?  As if fighting siblings is something extraordinary or rare?
Nope.  EVERY SINGLE Parent with more than one child is going through this exact same issue.

And as a parent of multiple children I can let you in on a secret.. Just have more kids.  It doesn’t lessen the fighting, but it spreads it out over more children, so it doesn’t seem as bad.  Plus if you’re lucky, you might just birth a peacemaker and they’ll sort the problem out for you!  More kids, equals more chance of popping out a Mahatma Gandhi, or Martin Luther King (You’ll also increase your chances of a Tiger woods – minus the sex addiction and drugs hopefully, or a Mark Zuckerberg.  You know, children that can  pay your retirement home fees!)

I understand though, that some people don’t want to just spawn off children willy nilly even if there are government handouts to be had.  If you’re one of these sticklers, I guess you’ll have to do something else.

If I worked on it for a bit, I could create my own miniature hit man squad that would literally kill for freddo frogs

Bribery is always a good option.  My kids will do anything for chocolate.  I’m pretty sure if I worked on it for a bit, I could create my own miniature hit man squad that would literally kill for freddo frogs..

It does also sound like your having trouble keeping your kids apart – bunnings have some cheap chains and padlocks, that would at least keep the two of them separated a bit better for you.  Unless you’re raising a Houdini or two, it should buy you enough time to fortify yourself with a schnapps.

This idea may take a bit of time and effort on your part, it’s definitely not a quick fix but I do believe it’s very important for the development of your little trainee humans.   Teach them about other peoples feelings.  Maybe a lesson in psychology.  I believe it’s quite important to show them new simple concepts and ideas about gas lighting, passive aggressiveness and some good old fashioned emotional abuse.  If they knew how much more damaging these techniques are than simple fighting and violence, I’m sure they’d move on to these more effective approaches.  Strategies that leave no physical marks – so you’re in the clear with social services!

And of course you could always just let them go at it. Maybe they’ll get it out of their systems..  Maybe give them a knife each and make it a sort of “Hunger Games” experience.  There will be only one victor, but an only child is a quiet child..

May the odds be ever in your favor

Mrs. Piggy

See more advice Mrs. Piggy dishes out to the helpless and hopeless.

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Easy Tips For Keeping Young Children Occupied While Hung-Over

Ok, the title is a bit of a misnomer – you don’t actually have to have had an insanely huge night that involved 9 bottles of wine, 2 friends, 2 trays of chocolate brownies, a bottle of rum and multiple drunken text messages for these tips to be useful.. you could have the flu, you could have morning sickness, or you could just be damn sick of your toddlers and playing ‘let’s eat that pretend cake and say yum yum’ again – I don’t judge.


ways to keep toddlers entertained without having to move or interact with them more than you need to

Anyway, these are my tried and tested favorite ways to keep toddlers entertained without having to move or interact with them more than you need to:


1. Set up a tub of water outside (or in the bathtub in winter), give them a bit of bubble bath and some scourers, then ask them to “clean.”
They can clean their toys, clean the fence, hell they can even clean the grass, as long as they leave you alone, as you sob quietly into your hydralite.


2. YouTube cat videos are not just for adults.
Child number one was not a tv kid – and trust me, I tried to get him hooked, I tried so very hard!
As soon as a cute cat was on YouTube, he was still. Blissfully, quietly still!
**Super mama hack: if the video has babies as well as cats, you’ll get twice as much peace.


3. Stickers. Need I say more? Oh I do need to say more. Ok, if a book or piece of paper doesn’t cut it, take a couple of aspirin, get comfy on the couch or in your bed, allocate an arm/leg to each child, then request stickers. Tell them you want to be covered completely.
This one works well because the fools – I mean lovely bundles of joy think that you’re playing with them.  You can be present without being present..
** Super mama hack: do not doze off unless you know all permanent markers are out of your kids reach. Child number 2 taught me that once their artistic juices start flowing, apparently it’s not a huge leap from stickers to markers..

Read on to find out how to relieve some of your frustrations with toddlers without getting in trouble with social services…

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