Dear Mrs Piggy,
I need some help with my husbands wardrobe.
No matter what I do, he just messes it up!
His shoes are thrown in on the floor, he pulls out all his shirts and just stuffs them all back in. It’s a mess!
Should I get boxes or baskets for everything? What’s with that special folding technique that shows him all of his shirts so he doesn’t make a mess?
What would work best for a messy man that doesn’t seem to care?
Trying to Tidy,
Tin Can Bay
Dear Trying to Tidy,
The only box I recommend for this situation is a box of wine.
Let me run through a scenario with you: you go through a lot of effort to clean up after your husband as if he was an adorable yet foolish puppy that pooped in your shoe. He re-messes.
You get resentful and drink that box of wine I mentioned earlier, re-clean the cupboard, which he promptly re-messes the next time he really really needs “that black shirt with the thing from that shop you bought him 2 years ago”.
You then drink two more boxes of wine and quietly plot his murder.
And as far as I know they don’t let you have boxes of wine in jail.
It’s not your poor disheveled husbands fault that you got addicted to a show on Netflix and feel the need to kondo his life down to 3 shirts, two shorts and a pot plant.
I suggest that instead you go outside and relax with a drink – while you lecture your daughters on why it’s not a women’s job to clean up after a man continuously (and just for good measure, you should probably get your son to bring you another wine. You know, for feminists sake)
Let your poor husband be the uncouth, messy slob that he’s always been, even if it’s just behind the closed door of his wardrobe.
Love Mrs. Piggy
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