Ask the Pig: Should I Pierce My Child’s Ears?

Dear Mrs. Piggy,

I have a 6 month old baby, and I don’t know what to do about their ears.

I think that earrings on babies are totally adorable, and I really want to pierce her ears.

My husband is totally against it.  He says its mutilating her, and what happens if she doesn’t want them later.  He says it will cause her pain for no reason.

But they will look SO ADORABLE!  I’ve already bought three pairs of earrings for her, and really really want to put them on!!

Should I pierce, or not?

Please Help,

Excited Mummy, Vancouver.


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Dear Excited Mummy,

So you’ve gone on a shopping spree, and now want to justify your purchases by stabbing your child in the ears?  I say go for it!

Earrings on babies are adorable, and the sooner you get it done, the better.  If you wait too long, your baby will notice them and start tugging on those gorgeous earrings that you’ve lovingly bought her.  While earrings on bubs are pretty darn cute, giant earholes that you can fit a thumb through are not.

Eeeeewwwwwwww! Put that thing away!

If you want to dress your child up as a little doll, and change her outfit and earrings 4 times a day, you go right ahead and do it!  Why else would we mums go through the whole pregnancy/labour thing?  It’s for the customizable baby/toy we get at the end..

What I think you are really going to need help with is getting around your husband’s views…

If he was as sleep deprived as you no doubt are, I’d just suggest trying to convince him that the baby came out with holes, and you just put the earrings in to plug them up.. but chances are, he’s sleeping blissfully at night while your up with your doll/baby attached like a wet-vac you your boob. As you stare longingly at her earlobes.

Perhaps if you bribed him with sex.  But you have a 6 month old, so you’re probably covered in vomit and poop, and will fall asleep on top of him anyway..

What would most likely work with my Mr. Piggy is the old money gambit..  Show him the earrings that you’ve already bought, tell him how much they cost, then tell him you’ve lost the receipts and can’t return them.

If he’s anything like my clever husband, he’ll be insisting that you go out right now and get his darling angel’s ears painfully stabbed with a gun so that those expensive earrings won’t go to waste!

Give it a go, and good luck!

I hope this advice helps you make the right decision for your family.

Love Mrs. Piggy.

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